These last few weeks, my heart has really been burdened for all my Liberty University Class of 2013 loves! I've been watching and reminiscing and longing for you all with great joy and wonder. I remember those feeling of panic and frustration, a little bit of hope and a longing for adventure mixed with a whole of ton uncertainty and frankly...fear. It was this time last year that I walked across that stage, packed up my apartment and said goodbye to a whole lot of people I loved. I assumed that I would be soon returning to their fellowship and at least living somewhat near (within visiting distance. ;) ) If you would have told me then that I would be where I am now, I would have dropped to the ground and thrown a hissy fit with tears streaming down my face. But, here I am, no hissy-fits, no tears.
So what does it look like, a year out from graduation?
I found out that I was a little wrong about my expectations of having a life after I got out of college. Wasn't my excuse for not loving on people that I was always too busy? Now, busy-ness takes on a whole nother form, and I almost think that returning to those college days would be great! (except the being broke part, lol) More than that, I've discovered that friendships take a lot of work....after hours. Not only do you put in your time at work and your time in scheduled ministry, you also put time in building relationships in small groups, and if you wanna live the Gospel, you put time and a whole lot of effort -mostly uncomfortable effort- into being with people who haven't yet caught a glimpse of the Gospel. It goes beyond small groups once a week and Saturday serve. Its staying up to just talk to people, its getting up in the middle of the night to drive them home, its going places and doing things that you don't really enjoy because you believe that people shouldn't have to convert to your culture before they can see Jesus (or after they fall in love with him for that matter.) Its about loving without demanding anything in return, being offended and not letting the offense affect your relationship. Its the Gospel-living and breathing.
Another thing I learned is that God's plan doesn't always have your degree stamped all over it. I started off my post-college time working at a fuel station to pay the bills. As fall came around I joined the worship team at a local church plant and started playing and singing on Sundays. Then, I got hired as a part time music teacher (which...if you know me...you know is just hilarious...I honestly think that was God just having some fun. ;) ) Later in the fall, I changed positions and was hired as a pharmacy technician. Medical and worship ....not all that similar for the most part. It wasn't even management or anything to do with my business specialization!! Lol. But, I studied and passed the test. And am now certified to be a pharmacy technician. In December, I resigned from my teaching position and not too much longer after that, was hired on full time in the pharmacy. Oh yeah, in that in between time I started taking a perspectives class. (mainly, because there were finally people there my age!) (Head's up....it'll change your life www.perspectives.org) And....I discovered God's global purpose. I fell in love with who God is, and knew that had to change how I did what I did. God calls us to "go as far as you can see." So, I prayed that God would use what he had placed in my hands for his glory. And He is faithful. He put Pharmacy into my hands and then called me to go to Belize to use that privilege to strengthen His church. (T-4 days!)
A few days ago, I was talking to a lot of fresh grads from a school in town and they were encouraging me, saying, "how can you give up on your dream of a job in music and settle for Pharmacy?" With a huge smile on my face, I said, sometimes, God gives you a dream and asks you to pursue it and when you obey, he gives you another little glimpse...like a dream inside a dream...and you discover that the dream you had was only the very beginning of an enormous dream that will continue to be revealed to eternity.
So, for all my friends just now embarking on this journey, I say: God's call isn't always about which job best uses your chosen degree. Sometimes, flexibility (and a little heartache) bring about great joy! And, to all of you returning to small town life like me where the population of the other gender that loves Jesus is slim to none- know that there is a perfect peace and plan that finds you wrapped up in a love inexpressible- far greater than moving to a large area for that off chance that God might put that someone in your path. And...don't buy into this...I need to become something great in the meantime business...God's heart is for you to understand that you already are something great because you belong to a Father who is very fond of you.
Hope lies on the horizon.
Deditio- victory through unconditional surrender
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