These last few weeks, my heart has really been burdened for all my Liberty University Class of 2013 loves! I've been watching and reminiscing and longing for you all with great joy and wonder. I remember those feeling of panic and frustration, a little bit of hope and a longing for adventure mixed with a whole of ton uncertainty and frankly...fear. It was this time last year that I walked across that stage, packed up my apartment and said goodbye to a whole lot of people I loved. I assumed that I would be soon returning to their fellowship and at least living somewhat near (within visiting distance. ;) ) If you would have told me then that I would be where I am now, I would have dropped to the ground and thrown a hissy fit with tears streaming down my face. But, here I am, no hissy-fits, no tears.
So what does it look like, a year out from graduation?
I found out that I was a little wrong about my expectations of having a life after I got out of college. Wasn't my excuse for not loving on people that I was always too busy? Now, busy-ness takes on a whole nother form, and I almost think that returning to those college days would be great! (except the being broke part, lol) More than that, I've discovered that friendships take a lot of work....after hours. Not only do you put in your time at work and your time in scheduled ministry, you also put time in building relationships in small groups, and if you wanna live the Gospel, you put time and a whole lot of effort -mostly uncomfortable effort- into being with people who haven't yet caught a glimpse of the Gospel. It goes beyond small groups once a week and Saturday serve. Its staying up to just talk to people, its getting up in the middle of the night to drive them home, its going places and doing things that you don't really enjoy because you believe that people shouldn't have to convert to your culture before they can see Jesus (or after they fall in love with him for that matter.) Its about loving without demanding anything in return, being offended and not letting the offense affect your relationship. Its the Gospel-living and breathing.
Another thing I learned is that God's plan doesn't always have your degree stamped all over it. I started off my post-college time working at a fuel station to pay the bills. As fall came around I joined the worship team at a local church plant and started playing and singing on Sundays. Then, I got hired as a part time music teacher (which...if you know me...you know is just hilarious...I honestly think that was God just having some fun. ;) ) Later in the fall, I changed positions and was hired as a pharmacy technician. Medical and worship ....not all that similar for the most part. It wasn't even management or anything to do with my business specialization!! Lol. But, I studied and passed the test. And am now certified to be a pharmacy technician. In December, I resigned from my teaching position and not too much longer after that, was hired on full time in the pharmacy. Oh yeah, in that in between time I started taking a perspectives class. (mainly, because there were finally people there my age!) (Head's up....it'll change your life www.perspectives.org) And....I discovered God's global purpose. I fell in love with who God is, and knew that had to change how I did what I did. God calls us to "go as far as you can see." So, I prayed that God would use what he had placed in my hands for his glory. And He is faithful. He put Pharmacy into my hands and then called me to go to Belize to use that privilege to strengthen His church. (T-4 days!)
A few days ago, I was talking to a lot of fresh grads from a school in town and they were encouraging me, saying, "how can you give up on your dream of a job in music and settle for Pharmacy?" With a huge smile on my face, I said, sometimes, God gives you a dream and asks you to pursue it and when you obey, he gives you another little glimpse...like a dream inside a dream...and you discover that the dream you had was only the very beginning of an enormous dream that will continue to be revealed to eternity.
So, for all my friends just now embarking on this journey, I say: God's call isn't always about which job best uses your chosen degree. Sometimes, flexibility (and a little heartache) bring about great joy! And, to all of you returning to small town life like me where the population of the other gender that loves Jesus is slim to none- know that there is a perfect peace and plan that finds you wrapped up in a love inexpressible- far greater than moving to a large area for that off chance that God might put that someone in your path. And...don't buy into this...I need to become something great in the meantime business...God's heart is for you to understand that you already are something great because you belong to a Father who is very fond of you.
Hope lies on the horizon.
Deditio- victory through unconditional surrender
Tuesday, May 14, 2013
Tuesday, April 9, 2013
A lesson in defiance
Throughout the last few...months really, God has been challenging all my preconceived notions concerning His Word and His Ways. This radical change hinges on two contributing factors. 1) Jesus Plus Nothing Equals Everything by Tullian Tchividjian 2) Perspectives Class. Challenged by Tchividjian, I started to read Genesis. I was coming to terms not with the crazy Bible character "heroes" of Sunday School, but with the incredible way God uses messed up people to accomplish His plans. So take that same MO and apply it to Exodus. Tonight I am reading in chapter 5. We hit the central stage: Moses' first confrontation with Pharaoh. Lets just remember, Moses comes face to face with God and is forever changed. But, he doesn't pass on his identity of God's elect to his son. God runs Moses down and in His fury is poised for the kill when Moses' wife saves His life by circumcising their son. Moses then goes to stand before Pharaoh proclaiming that The LORD, the God of Israel seeks the worship of His people. Lets remember that all the while, God's plan has been that He receive worship from every tribe, tongue, nation and people. This includes Egypt. Pharaoh stands in defiance of the Lord saying, "Who is this "god" of yours to demand something from me?"Pharaoh increases the burden on Israel which causes what? It causes them to scatter across the nation seeking grain. What good does this scattering accomplish? The name of Yahweh moves across the country rather than just being centered in the hub of Goshen. God is still accomplishing His plan through the oppression of Pharaoh. And then we come to the end of chapter 5...and Moses has the audacity to declare that God has done evil? That He sent Moses to deliver His people...and He hasn't fulfilled His end of the deal! Did we learn nothing? The God of the Universe will not bow to Pharaoh. His law is just and his purpose is sure. He will bring about the worship of His name from every ethne regardless of human dictatorship or authority. Who are we to sit back and see that circumstances have not progressed at our desired pace and call God unjust or unrighteous?
What patience from our unrelenting King. He takes into His arms people who are all-too eager to rebel and defy Him.
What patience from our unrelenting King. He takes into His arms people who are all-too eager to rebel and defy Him.
Monday, January 21, 2013
Putting Things Into Perspective
Tonight was my first experience in Perspectives. To be honest, I never really thought about going because I graduated with a degree from a Christian University and figured that this class would be very similar to classes there. (Somehow I forgot how incredibly I loved going to class there in the meantime.) But, I had been personally invited to check it out by a few of the ladies in my church, and the first week was free, so I thought I would go to appease those asking and at least give it a try. The class starts at six and the pharmacy doesn't close until seven. Tonight, one of our roaming techs was coming from the clinic at six to stay until seven and close...well, not so much. By the time I left the store it was 7:00 and I seriously considered just going home. I'm extremely glad I didn't.
Now, with that backstory out of the way...
Tonight I engaged with the church and I think one of the most incredible parts was to walk in to the building where we hold our church services and to see that Wellspring made up like 25% of the people in the class. The other 75% attending the class were people I didn't know and had never met, all from this area, all desiring to learn about the story of God in this world. Walking in to that room was daunting, but it was incredible. I so look forward to meeting these people who are passionately pursuing Jesus Christ and desiring to serve Him with their lives. Its the church of South East Iowa meeting to see God glorify His name. =)
So, for all of you who have not ventured into this classroom tonight, let me bring a little of what God impressed upon my heart tonight.
The second of the half of the night (the part I actually made it to) was all about the second fulfillment of the Gospel- "Christ's life and the faith family that followed Him" If you think about it, the years that we call the intertestamental period or the silent years, weren't really all that silent on the global scale. Massive kingdoms were coming and going and once again Israel became enslaved by these massive global powers. It was during this time that the culture of oppression so dominated the thinking of the Hebrew leaders that the idea of the Messiah coming as a servant collapsed under the idea that the Messiah would come to establish the kingdom of Israel and overthrow the reign of the Gentiles. Into this world of a nation that desired domination came a servant/rabbi who chose the worst gang of followers imaginable including a tax collector (who was a traitor collecting money to give to the government who then paid soldiers who raped and pillaged its citizens) a terrorist (Judas the zealot) and his own betrayer. Jesus chose the rejects and built a team to create a global movement. This team was all about Israel rising from the ashes to conquer the Gentiles, but Jesus-their Messiah- spent 2/3 of his ministry serving Gentiles, not Jews. His perspective was global and at the cross, he demanded that God keep his word as stated in Habakkuk 2:14 " for the earth will be filled with the knowledge of the glory of the Lord as the waters cover the sea." The cross showed an amazing truth: God loves God more than anything. Jesus in his life of perfection perfectly obeyed the greatest two commands, to love God with all your heart, soul, mind, and strength. And to love your neighbor as much as you love yourself. Think about that for a minute. Jesus is God. And he loves his neighbor (aka you and me) as much as he loves himself. -now that is a woah moment for me.
As Jesus ascends into heaven he speaks the great commission. Many of this can quote this passage, but in our minds its implications don't really click. First we think that our goal is to reach Jerusalem OR Judea Or the ends of the earth. - Wrong. its not an optional statement here. Second, we think I reach Jerusalem Then Judea Then the ends of the earth. Wrong again. It says reach Jerusalem and Judea and the ends of this earth. AND. Its an inclusive statement made only possible when we understand that he is not saying, Michelle you reach your jersualem and your Judea and your ends of the earth. He is saying y'all, my beautiful bride, my church, together you reach Jerusalem and Judea and the ends of the earth because you establish for my name subsidiaries of worship which develop and grow to expand in a global array of bringing glory to my name. See, reaching the world is not the job of missionaries. Its the job of the church. (Another woah moment)
As we dive into the Word we discover so much more the depth of what it means to be a part of this body. To be the global church. To be the bride. And it changes our perspective...about everything.
Now, with that backstory out of the way...
Tonight I engaged with the church and I think one of the most incredible parts was to walk in to the building where we hold our church services and to see that Wellspring made up like 25% of the people in the class. The other 75% attending the class were people I didn't know and had never met, all from this area, all desiring to learn about the story of God in this world. Walking in to that room was daunting, but it was incredible. I so look forward to meeting these people who are passionately pursuing Jesus Christ and desiring to serve Him with their lives. Its the church of South East Iowa meeting to see God glorify His name. =)
So, for all of you who have not ventured into this classroom tonight, let me bring a little of what God impressed upon my heart tonight.
The second of the half of the night (the part I actually made it to) was all about the second fulfillment of the Gospel- "Christ's life and the faith family that followed Him" If you think about it, the years that we call the intertestamental period or the silent years, weren't really all that silent on the global scale. Massive kingdoms were coming and going and once again Israel became enslaved by these massive global powers. It was during this time that the culture of oppression so dominated the thinking of the Hebrew leaders that the idea of the Messiah coming as a servant collapsed under the idea that the Messiah would come to establish the kingdom of Israel and overthrow the reign of the Gentiles. Into this world of a nation that desired domination came a servant/rabbi who chose the worst gang of followers imaginable including a tax collector (who was a traitor collecting money to give to the government who then paid soldiers who raped and pillaged its citizens) a terrorist (Judas the zealot) and his own betrayer. Jesus chose the rejects and built a team to create a global movement. This team was all about Israel rising from the ashes to conquer the Gentiles, but Jesus-their Messiah- spent 2/3 of his ministry serving Gentiles, not Jews. His perspective was global and at the cross, he demanded that God keep his word as stated in Habakkuk 2:14 " for the earth will be filled with the knowledge of the glory of the Lord as the waters cover the sea." The cross showed an amazing truth: God loves God more than anything. Jesus in his life of perfection perfectly obeyed the greatest two commands, to love God with all your heart, soul, mind, and strength. And to love your neighbor as much as you love yourself. Think about that for a minute. Jesus is God. And he loves his neighbor (aka you and me) as much as he loves himself. -now that is a woah moment for me.
As Jesus ascends into heaven he speaks the great commission. Many of this can quote this passage, but in our minds its implications don't really click. First we think that our goal is to reach Jerusalem OR Judea Or the ends of the earth. - Wrong. its not an optional statement here. Second, we think I reach Jerusalem Then Judea Then the ends of the earth. Wrong again. It says reach Jerusalem and Judea and the ends of this earth. AND. Its an inclusive statement made only possible when we understand that he is not saying, Michelle you reach your jersualem and your Judea and your ends of the earth. He is saying y'all, my beautiful bride, my church, together you reach Jerusalem and Judea and the ends of the earth because you establish for my name subsidiaries of worship which develop and grow to expand in a global array of bringing glory to my name. See, reaching the world is not the job of missionaries. Its the job of the church. (Another woah moment)
As we dive into the Word we discover so much more the depth of what it means to be a part of this body. To be the global church. To be the bride. And it changes our perspective...about everything.
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